Inspire Hope

Over the past few years, weaving in and out of the jobs that I’ve had, the question of what I want to do with my life, comes up often.  It is either asked by a colleague after hours to pass the time or in my own head to justify my current position.   The question isn’t about what job do I want or where I want to live.  It’s always deeper then that.

What is it that I want to do with my life.

I think back at my life and how I quit everything before it had a chance to become something.  I never let anything blossom.  As soon as I started to see color come through, I picked it and moved on to the next.  Relationships, projects, jobs, school, religion, etc.   I try to justify it to myself by saying things like “It wasn’t want I really wanted” or “I was doing it for the wrong reason” or “I didn’t get anything out of it.”  My legacy became stagnant.  There was nothing for me to be proud of.  And it was my fault.

Often I ask myself “What am I doing with my life?”  But shouldn’t the question really be “What am I doing IN my life?”  What I do with my life isn’t really important or up to me.  What I do with my life is selfish and worldly.  Its materialistic, its simple, it’s unimaginative.

What I want to do in my life is much more than that.  I want to inspire.  I want to give hope.  I want to reassure everyone that will listen that everything is going to be ok.  I want to live in this life as an avatar of hope.

But how can I do this when most of the days I feel so hopeless.

How can I inspire others when I am feeling uninspired.

How can I assure others that everything is going to be ok when I have my doubts as well.

I think of all the times people have said “I will pray for you.”  I think of all the times people have argued against that statement saying that it’s empty.  Praying is fine but what of action?  Wanting to inspire is fine, but what about action?  What can I do to spread hope?

I write.

I write to beat the demon of doubt from myself.  I write to better articulate the feelings that are in my head and in my heart.  I write for others to read and to know that they aren’t alone.  I write to create hope, I write to inspire, and I write to assure you that everything will be ok.

My legacy is not what I have done or will do.  My legacy is who I have helped and who I have inspired.  My legacy will come from my faith.  There are no better forms of hope then the knowledge of what eternal glories await us.  I know everything will be ok because our savior Jesus Christ took our burdens from us.  He took the pains so that we may live and serve others.  Our burdens and pains and doubts are not for us to have.

“Adam fell that men might be; and men are, that they may have joy.”

I want to inspire hope.